It started with the smallest hankering as I lay motionless in the grass, victim to the scorching sun. The sweltering heat surrounded me and before long, the insatiable hunger inside of me dominated my every thought. What could possibly satisfy my cravings? And then it hit me. An Oreo McFlurry. Picturing McDonald’s advertisements for the delicious, creamy concoction made my stomach growl in anticipation: my mind was set! Yet, little did I know that this story would end in a disappointing epiphany.

Twenty minutes later, I was eagerly holding an Oreo McFlurry. The first spoonful filled me with joy and serenity, but, after further consumption, I began to feel as though something were off. When I looked into my cup, I was shattered. Deep sorrow and frustration erupted in my core as I realized I had been cheated—my McFlurry only had a few Oreo crumbles on top. There were no Oreos inside of the ice cream! My McFlurry had me in a McFury! How dare McDonald’s disrupt the delicate ratio of cookie to soft serve? I had paid for the decadent Oreo McFlurry I had seen on television, not this flimsy cup of nothingness! This deceitful experience was inMcScusable! How could McDonald’s have the audacity to commit this inhumane crime? Dear readers, hear my plea, hard swerve away from this soft serve!